Ben explained, “I’d always felt that there was something a bit “off” with me compared to most of the children and adults I grew up around. I was an advanced child and learned to speak and read very early compared to my peers, but found it very difficult to connect with other children in the same way they did with each other. This continued through my teenage years right through to adulthood now. I sometimes struggle to find context within conversations, and social conventions and “unsaid” rules and expectations do evade me quite often.”
Ben explained how, growing up, the condition and diagnostic criteria for ASC weren’t very well-known. He said, “It never really occurred to myself or my parents that I could be autistic because of how the criteria were assessed back in the 80s and 90s. It’s only in the last ten years or so that I’ve had any kind of inkling that this could apply to me.”
Last year, Ben had to take some time off work to focus on his mental health and during that period, he received the support he needed that would later lead to his ASC diagnosis. He said, “I was signposted by my counsellor to a service called Psychiatry-UK, which deals with adult ASC and ADHD assessment where I was eventually diagnosed. To be honest, this is all still very new to me, and I’ve been going through what feels like the five stages of grief – denial, anger, bargaining, depression and acceptance – while trying to get my head around my diagnosis. This feels a little daft, given that I’ve been clinically assessed by a qualified psychiatrist and clearly meet a large number of criteria for ASC, and have done since childhood. But one thing that I did find out when researching ASC while awaiting my assessment is that imposter syndrome is very real for neurodivergent people, so I suppose that all makes sense.”
Since receiving his diagnosis, Ben has received so much support. He told us, “I’m still at the start of my journey here but my partner Cat has been an amazing advocate for me and is an amazing support. My colleagues have been kind and understanding from the first time I mentioned I was awaiting assessment and I’m very appreciative of that support, to say the least.”
Ben is part of our Disability Network and is using his experience to raise awareness with other staff. The network is just one of five networks here at NWAS. It is open to all staff with disabilities and long-term health conditions, staff who care for someone with a disability and colleagues who want to learn more about disability. It promotes equality across the trust and aims to open up conversations about the barriers facing people with disabilities, to give staff a voice to improve understanding of disabilities, raise awareness and provides the opportunity to influence organisational change.
He hopes that by sharing his experience, it may help those who are in a similar situation to him. He said, “Being autistic does not affect my work as an EMA and I’m proud to be a member of the team. Looking back now, I’m very glad I spoke to my GP about it and while I understand that not everybody with autistic traits will want a diagnosis, it’s definitely helped put a lot of my life into more focus.”
If you are seeking support, please contact your GP, or reach out to a loved one, friend or colleague.